Cute Honks the Conch

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Kansas City does not have that many restaurants featuring conch on their menus. Obviously, the reason for that is that conch is not readily available in the Midwest. Cows are.

It is also not on every single menu in Key West, Florida, due to the fact that it’s difficult to harvest. Divers use masks, snorkels and fins often from a small boat to find conch in shallow but increasingly deeper waters. Extraction of the meat has to be done by hand as well. Particularly popular in the Bahamas and other Caribbean locations, it is becoming increasingly difficult to source due to overfishing and global warming.

Key West has been known as the Conch Republic, which is a bit of an ironic name right now as its conch fishery fell victim to overfishing nearly 60 years ago and now authorities are attempting rehabilitation. It turns out it is very difficult to bring back conch once they are gone. The U.S. is now the world’s biggest importer of conch meat, which has put more pressure on Bahamian fishermen (2% of their population) whose government is trying to not emulate the U.S. in destroying this mainstay crop.

Having learned all this, it is now difficult for me to eat conch fritters which are delicious when properly prepared. And I still remember a fabulous boating excursion (thanks Shelly and Larry!) off Cayman Island where two of the crew dived for conch, found four, and made us the most amazing ceviche I’ve ever had. I still cherish two of those shells whose inhabitants gave us their lives.

The middle picture is of a real conch and a 3-D plastic printed one.

However, it was not at all difficult for us to enjoy the 63rd annual conch blowing contest in Key West this weekend. Cute, of course, found that this event was happening, signed himself up to blow a conch, which he borrowed from the contest organizers as did several others. How hard can it be, thought my former trumpet player?

The 30 or 40 contestants ranged from five years old to 85 or so and many were first timers like Cute. Many had practiced for hours. There was even a high school band of players. There were prizes for the winners in each category. The queen and king (all of him, not just his shoulder) from last year graced us.

Turns out that having a former trumpet lip is not all that’s required. However, Cute was not devastated, or surprised, to learn that he was not a winner, at this anyway. And how proudly he wore his participation metal.

Then he promptly went to get a piece of Key Lime pie as consolation.